The column that usually names names but can’t
this issue if we want to stay in business...
t’s our biggest and most important issue For everyone who doesn’t care about the results
I
— the Top 100 DJs. We didn’t actually there’s hordes who takes it deadly seriously. Mainly,
There is a whole
design it to be important all those years ago. to the reader, the punter, the raver... even a DJ or
But clearly with the amount of hoo-har and two... this is about entertainment. Forgetting your
new generation
shenanigans that surround us at this time of year woes and dancing the night away. But it’s also a
there is a whole world out there that has made the global industry. Industry means money. Money
Top 100 important whether you like it or not. means no sense of humour. It puts the bread on the
out there
Apart from being a bastard of an issue to put table. Yes, for some it may be handmade that
together, the Top 100 makes us piss our pants here morning by the cook and laid steaming on a
waiting in the
in the office. Some of the stuff that goes on is truly 20ft-long Louis XIV dining job... but not always.
brazen bronze-balled bollocks. It is laugh out loud Not all the names in the 100 are individuals. Some
funny the things people do to get in and the lengths are part of a business that many rely on. So they
wings and the
they will go. take that deadly seriously. And a good place in The
We’ve published and been damned in regards to the 100 can seriously help your income. No need to
future belongs
cheaters and scammers before but why do people go thank us, all past winners are most welcome (we like
to such lengths over the poll? Asian food, costly jewels and records, by the way).
Some take it as seriously as they possibly can.
to them.
We all know who is boss and who is bullshit. For Because they are in business. And in some societies
every underground hero who never gets a look-in downright cheating is considered a natural part of
there is an over inflated ‘star’ who hasn’t played a ‘success’. Really, to get to the bottom of this you
new tune in years. We don’t need a newspaper to tell have to look at the nature of voting itself. Firstly, no Ultimately the people who care most about the Top
us the world’s a mess or a meteorologist to tell us system is infallible... but to rig it without anyone 100 are the DJs and industry. Sadly for them it’s a
the current weather... we just open the door. knowing you need serious SERIOUS power... oh and public vote. The voice of the people. A popularity
Likewise, few of you reading this need a poll to tell more time and manpower than you can imagine... contest. The voice of the people has never been
you what you like. and that only happens in a banana republic and popular with those who deem themselves above
So chillax maaaan! It’s just the voice of the people. some parts of America. others. You are not. You are outnumbered and
Like it or not, the Top 100 is based entirely on the surrounded.
public vote. You may be doubtful. But the numbers Of course, a DJ’s opinion of the poll can swiftly At least that shred of the original acid house feeling
don’t lie. Which is another reason to chuckle. If a DJ change. Over the years we’ve had numerous DJs laud remains. The wrinklies who each claim to have
and their ‘people’ canvassed, cheated and bribed the poll when they’re sitting comfortably inside it. started it can huff and puff all they like, the
every soul on their collective databases it would still Then guess what? It suddenly doesn’t matter and industry can manufacture as much spam as an
be a pathetic drop in the ocean of the Percentage isn’t relevant when they slip outside the Top 100. We insomniac butcher but sorry... you don’t own this
Sea. The ‘industry’ just doesn’t have the numbers to think one doth protest too much. What happened to democracy. Everyone else does. It’s very much like
weigh in enough to dent the maths. So when we do being gracious, for fuck’s sake? today’s politics, of which we are an accidental
get a disproportionate amount of votes for ‘DJ And then there’s the non-voters. Couldn’t be arsed microcosm.
Nobody’ it rings ten bells. to vote but now want to bang on about the results
from now ’til Judge Jules’s eight-year-old son starts There is a whole new generation out there waiting in
Don’t you understand it yet? There is NOTHING YOU playing back-to back with his Pa. Give your gob a the wings and the future belongs to them... and you
CAN DO to dent the voice of the people. There is a lot rest. Don’t like the results? Then it’s your fault if you can’t buy them because they already own the
of them. didn’t participate. More so if you really care. internet. Like it or lump it.
258
www.djmag.com
DJ467.shameless.indd 258 16/10/08 18:56:34
Page 1 |
Page 2 |
Page 3 |
Page 4 |
Page 5 |
Page 6 |
Page 7 |
Page 8 |
Page 9 |
Page 10 |
Page 11 |
Page 12 |
Page 13 |
Page 14 |
Page 15 |
Page 16 |
Page 17 |
Page 18 |
Page 19 |
Page 20 |
Page 21 |
Page 22 |
Page 23 |
Page 24 |
Page 25 |
Page 26 |
Page 27 |
Page 28 |
Page 29 |
Page 30 |
Page 31 |
Page 32 |
Page 33 |
Page 34 |
Page 35 |
Page 36 |
Page 37 |
Page 38 |
Page 39 |
Page 40 |
Page 41 |
Page 42 |
Page 43 |
Page 44 |
Page 45 |
Page 46 |
Page 47 |
Page 48 |
Page 49 |
Page 50 |
Page 51 |
Page 52 |
Page 53 |
Page 54 |
Page 55 |
Page 56 |
Page 57 |
Page 58 |
Page 59 |
Page 60 |
Page 61 |
Page 62 |
Page 63 |
Page 64 |
Page 65 |
Page 66 |
Page 67 |
Page 68 |
Page 69 |
Page 70 |
Page 71 |
Page 72 |
Page 73 |
Page 74 |
Page 75 |
Page 76 |
Page 77 |
Page 78 |
Page 79 |
Page 80 |
Page 81 |
Page 82 |
Page 83 |
Page 84 |
Page 85 |
Page 86 |
Page 87 |
Page 88 |
Page 89 |
Page 90 |
Page 91 |
Page 92 |
Page 93 |
Page 94 |
Page 95 |
Page 96 |
Page 97 |
Page 98 |
Page 99 |
Page 100 |
Page 101 |
Page 102 |
Page 103 |
Page 104 |
Page 105 |
Page 106 |
Page 107 |
Page 108 |
Page 109 |
Page 110 |
Page 111 |
Page 112 |
Page 113 |
Page 114 |
Page 115 |
Page 116 |
Page 117 |
Page 118 |
Page 119 |
Page 120 |
Page 121 |
Page 122 |
Page 123 |
Page 124 |
Page 125 |
Page 126 |
Page 127 |
Page 128 |
Page 129 |
Page 130 |
Page 131 |
Page 132 |
Page 133 |
Page 134 |
Page 135 |
Page 136 |
Page 137 |
Page 138 |
Page 139 |
Page 140 |
Page 141 |
Page 142 |
Page 143 |
Page 144 |
Page 145 |
Page 146 |
Page 147 |
Page 148 |
Page 149 |
Page 150 |
Page 151 |
Page 152 |
Page 153 |
Page 154 |
Page 155 |
Page 156 |
Page 157 |
Page 158 |
Page 159 |
Page 160 |
Page 161 |
Page 162 |
Page 163 |
Page 164 |
Page 165 |
Page 166 |
Page 167 |
Page 168 |
Page 169 |
Page 170 |
Page 171 |
Page 172 |
Page 173 |
Page 174 |
Page 175 |
Page 176 |
Page 177 |
Page 178 |
Page 179 |
Page 180 |
Page 181 |
Page 182 |
Page 183 |
Page 184 |
Page 185 |
Page 186 |
Page 187 |
Page 188 |
Page 189 |
Page 190 |
Page 191 |
Page 192 |
Page 193 |
Page 194 |
Page 195 |
Page 196 |
Page 197 |
Page 198 |
Page 199 |
Page 200 |
Page 201 |
Page 202 |
Page 203 |
Page 204 |
Page 205 |
Page 206 |
Page 207 |
Page 208 |
Page 209 |
Page 210 |
Page 211 |
Page 212 |
Page 213 |
Page 214 |
Page 215 |
Page 216 |
Page 217 |
Page 218 |
Page 219 |
Page 220 |
Page 221 |
Page 222 |
Page 223 |
Page 224 |
Page 225 |
Page 226 |
Page 227 |
Page 228 |
Page 229 |
Page 230 |
Page 231 |
Page 232 |
Page 233 |
Page 234 |
Page 235 |
Page 236 |
Page 237 |
Page 238 |
Page 239 |
Page 240 |
Page 241 |
Page 242 |
Page 243 |
Page 244 |
Page 245 |
Page 246 |
Page 247 |
Page 248 |
Page 249 |
Page 250 |
Page 251 |
Page 252 |
Page 253 |
Page 254 |
Page 255 |
Page 256 |
Page 257 |
Page 258 |
Page 259