inspiration
Love Stories
by Diana Daffner
Blessed
Quiet
r
emember the Archie Bunker
show, All in the Family? In
one episode, a young woman
is telling Edith how exciting her new
relationship is. Then she asks, “When
you and Archie make love, is it like the
4th of July?” Edith sighs and replies,
“Honey, when me and Archie make
love, it’s more like Thanksgiving!”
by Cathy Lewis What holiday does YOUR love-
making, YOUR relationship resemble?
A Noisy World
Relationship experts theorize that we
Hormone levels are highest when we each have a “love story,” a personal
F
rom the pervasive hum of highway first arise. Most people have coffee and parable that guides us in creating and
traffic to the discordant drone of turn on the news. That’s the worst thing maintaining our relationship. Based
office machines and household appli- we can do. on our own upbringing and genetic
ances, our days are rarely still. Television Eat at a table, without TV temperament, these stories vary widely.
and radio chatter fill endless hours, cell or reading. Mindful eating helps us Some of us have stories in which love is
phone conversations assault us on every enjoy food more and prevents overeat- easy, harmonious, maybe even roman-
side, and the end of the day finds us ing, because we are more attuned to tic, like Valentine’s Day. Others expect
tense and weary. Little wonder. Studies our body’s signals of satisfaction. Plus, love to be tumultuous, laced with
by leading health organizations and re- it allows us to metabolize food more fireworks, and not just in the bedroom.
search universities demonstrate the close efficiently. Still others expect love to be filled with
relationship of exposure to unwanted Drive in silence. The car is a fine unexpected, scary thrills, like Hal-
noise with increased levels of stress and place to get in touch with our thoughts loween. Then there are those who treat
related health issues. and be with our self. Silence rejuve- their relationship less like a holiday
For example, a study conducted nates us. and more like an employment contract,
near London’s Heathrow Airport Create a silence retreat at home. wanting the comfort of a stable power
showed an association of regular Set aside an evening at home with no structure, whether equal or hierarchical.
exposure to environmental noise with talking. Switch the phone ringer off and The theory suggests that if two people
mental health problems and individu- don’t answer it; turn off the TV. Don’t run have matching or complementing love
als’ increased production of the stress needless appliances. A cooperative fam- stories, they are more likely destined for
hormone, cortisol. Other medical stud- ily can do this together, or trade nights a long and happy relationship together.
ies have linked exposure to noise with with a partner willing to take the kids Right now you might be reflecting
psychological distress, gastrointestinal out to dinner and for fun around town. about your own love story, and curious
problems and cardiovascular condi- Practice silent exercise. When about your partner’s. You might be won-
tions. Even low-level sounds have been exercising, work out without an iPod, dering if they are similar or different.
connected with problems ranging from video or other media. If possible, But alas, your partner may be someone
increased aggression to poor sleep. exercise outdoors. Silence helps us who couldn’t care less about theories
pay attention to everything our body is of love, and is only interested in the
A Restful Answer
doing—our breathing, muscles and pos- meat and potatoes part, the day-to-day
Janet Luhrs, a pioneer of the Sim- ture. Silence helps us heed the healthy experiences of love and life.
plicity Movement, suggests five ways signals our body sends—perhaps to Or perhaps it’s the reverse. Your
to institute daily moments of silence slow down, go faster or straighten up. partner often wants to discuss issues
to counter these effects. “In realizing Janet Luhrs is the international pertaining to your relationship or
more blessed quiet, you’ll not only bestselling author of The Simple Living relationships in general, and you, well,
feel better,” she advises, “you’ll also be Guide and Simple Loving, as well as you’re a person of action and couldn’t
healthier.” the Simple Living newsletter and care less about what so-called-experts
Start the day with silence.
SimpleLiving.com. say. (Then again, if you’ve read this far,
Before rushing headlong into another Study Sources: Journal of Personal- you probably do enjoy mental stimula-
day, do something relaxing for at least ity and Social Psychology; Journal of tion, which is not to say you don’t also
12 minutes upon waking. Stretch, read Clinical and Hospital Pharmacy; Social enjoy physical stimulation!)
an inspirational message or meditate. and Preventive Medicine. Regardless of the differences, all
32 Broward County
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