Today's Business Woman 2/08

Bringing up a family while
managing a successful career
is tiring and very tough, take
heed of Barbara Cassani’s
tried and tested advice on not
letting guilt take over
O
ne of the tricky things about being
a working women is that you can’t
help feeling that you should fulﬁl your
traditional role as mother and housekeeper,
as well as having a job outside the home.
That is, unless you’re lucky enough to have
a stay-at-home husband! In this impossible
situation, you must acknowledge you can’t
do everything, and to take that sense of
humour that helps you at work home with
you. I used to laugh and say to people that
they should see my sock drawers; they’re
a mess. But I don’t care. You cannot run a
company and have the world’s most perfect
home. I’m in a lucky position where I can
afford to have people to help me, my sock
drawers aren’t perfect but they’re a heck of a
lot better because I’ve got people helping me!
I think particularly in Britain, women feel a
huge pressure to have a meal on the table, to
have chosen all their children’s clothes and to
be there for every school event – as well as
Bottles and toys have
having a big career. Well you can’t. You have
to share the desk with
to choose what’s most important to you. laptops and paperwork for
I have a 13 and a 16 year old and they’re
many working mothers
wonderfully well adjusted and they accept
that I’m someone who needs to be out in you expect him to pick up his share of it. I
the big wide world. They also know that it
In this impossible
really resent men that imply that a woman’s
doesn’t reﬂect on my love for them. You have
to choose your partner really carefully, and situation you must
full salary goes for paying the childcare. Well
excuse me, aren’t you a part of it? Allowing
utor; shutterstock.co.uk
make sure that you push childcare issues
onto them as well; after all the children
acknowledge you
this sort of mentality only adds to the guilt,
and guilt only works if you take it on. Don’t let
belong to both of you.
can’t do everything,
yourself. Having said that neither should you
Great expectations and to take that
feel guilty if you want to stay home with the
kids, though then you have to accept that
The women I feel for are the single mums,
they have a special challenge and they
sense of humour that
your career will be set back, because without
a doubt it will. But if ultimately when you’re
deserve everyone’s support. But if you’re in
helps you at work
85 and you’re sitting in your rocking chair
a two-parent relationship, before you even
have children you need to have a discussion home with you
looking back over your life, you’re happy
saying, ‘I chose to take 10 years out
istockphoto.com/ Anthony Rosenburg/ James T
© with your partner and basically indicate that and have kids, then I picked up my career
TODAY’S BUSINESS WOMAN 61
T'sBW15 Working mother 2.indd 61 1/12/08 6:11:25 pm
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